Beer: A Quality of Life Indicator in Which the US Excels

Wikipedia provides us with this insight:
"Beer is one of the world's oldest prepared beverages, possibly dating back to the early Neolithic or 9500 BC, when cereal was first farmed, and is recorded in the written history of ancient Egypt and Mesopotamia. Archaeologists speculate that beer was instrumental in the formation of civilisations."

If beer was instrumental in the formation of civilizations, then mightn’t one judge the quality of a civilization by the ease of access it provides to this civilization-generating quantity?

An article in The Economist provides us with this data on the state of civilization around the world.

It takes only about 5 minutes of labor for the average US worker to accumulate enough wealth to purchase a half liter of beer. What more could one want from their country? We are at the pinnacle of civilization!

So if you are depressed about crazy politicians, an economy that sucks, disappearing savings, children who graduated from college in order reestablish residency in your home.... Take heart, your nation has provided a mechanism by which you can put all that behind you. And it will only take about 10-20 minutes of healthy labor to activate it. Daily usage is recommended for best results.